Bill Bailey Cars Gary Newman cover

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Mustang Valley and the Munchies From Hell.

My god... I just went to Co-Op on my own and it was terrifying. I hda a panic attack as I opened the door to leave, my muscles all decided to contract at the same time so I had to walk up the road like a robot, and I had two fatarsed 13 year olds laughing at me all the way to the shop.
When I got into Co-Op I felt a bit better. I kept trying to remind myself to breathe, and not be afraid of stopping to look at something. I always feel like I'm being watched and suspected if I wander about looking at things then not buying them.
Anyway, I managed to get everything on my list. I knew I'd want a drink and to trough out of anxiety afterwards, so I went with it. But I am immensely proud of myself in that I only bought one bottle of wine, one packet of chocolate and a single packet of hula hoops. Normally I come out with two sharing size bags of crisps and a monster bag of chocolate. I also tend to buy a bottle of whiskey which is about 20 drinks rather than a bottle of wine, which is about 4. I'm proud. Extremely proud.
But I'm also extremely sweaty.
I'm off for a cigarette, and to get some cold air on my armpits.
I'm really improving, but I have such a long way to go...

another late night

I should be ashamed. My eyebags are so black I look like an upside down goth. But this time I have an excuse for my late bednesses: I am in pain. My ears are both infected; they're burning, throbbing, stabbing, weeping and generally shooting for an asbo. Which, I recently learnt, is not a games company.
In happier news, my life was dramatically improved yesterday after purchasing some new washing up liquid. Sad, you may call me, but wait! It was co-op mint scented blue washing up liquid. Yes, eat your earlier words, O scorners. Now when I wash up I can pretend my dishes are lost continents, submerged in a tropical blue ocean. A minty ocean. With foamy clouds roaming it's surface. Who's the saddo now, eh?
Today has been a bit weird. Gerwyn phoned Seattle to shout at an answering machine, Scamp did a bright green poo, I wrote on Dara O'Briain's hand, and Ed ripped his phone out of the wall because it rang. I'm starting to wonder exactly what the definition of normal is. Maybe it's relative. Or in my case, academic.
I'm tired.
I should sleep now.
And I will do if my ears decide to stop BURNING.
Docs tomorrow, fingers crossed, for some good old antibiotics. By this time next week every bodily secretion will smell of penicillin. Rawr. Down boys.

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Snore

I'm knackered.. *yawn*
I had a fun night last night, drank a bit too much but jammily didn't have a hangover this morn. Woop! I still feel ill though, thanks to my yucky ears.
I got to mixing up my paint for the kitchen earlier, but it's not mixing well. I mixed half a tub of blue with a whole tub of magnolia, and it's just gone a really fresh white-grey. Grr. Dad wants to take me shopping tomorrow morning, but I really don't know if I'll be up to it. We're supposed to be going to buy paint (proper paint instead of leftovers mixed together), but I can't even remember where the colour chart went that had the one I wanted on it. Blah. I really feel cacky. And to top it all off I can't have a shower! If I do I'll have to put dirty clothes back on, and since my pyjamas shrunk in the wash I have to sleep semi-nood which I hate. In fact, that's probably why I've been having nightmares recently, I feel really exposed and vulnerable with nowt on. I'd happily wear chainmail if it was available.
Anyways, I was going to give a full rundown of a (for once) very news-laden day, but I feel my headache coming on again, and my ears are stabbing. I ran out of most of my dinner ingredients, so ended up having to wait for dad to pass the house at half 8 to bring me some chips. I feel really greasy and stuffed now. Argh... Oh well, at least I'm not hungry.
Well, time for bed then. Fingers crossed I'll have an uninterrupted sleep for once, and won't have to go out tomorrow :P

Pills and celery.

I have got SUCH a headache. I had a shitty nightmare last night that I got raped then covered in petrol and set on fire, and in between nasty dreams I had Scamp bothering me to wake up and go downstairs. He never wants anything; no food, drink or to go outside for a pee... I bring him down, and on my way to fill his water bowl and open the back door he disappears into the front room, jumps on the sofa and settles down. GRR!
I was supposed to be painting my dining room today, but my head is killing me and I don't think I could survive the fumes. And to top it off my ears are both infected AGAIN. Argh! Gerwyn's coming over later for a drink which I really want, but my head may explode before then. I'm hoping my headache subsides by the time he arrives otherwise I won't enjoy it.

*yawn*

Tempted to have a nap, but I know my fringe will go weird if I lie on it.
I drew some celery. Yum.

there were two in the bed...

Awww, aren't they cute, every level is rattified :-P

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